What To Know Before You Go

If you were harbouring any worries about your social life at St Andrews, dear Fresher, be glad that this humble magazine has found its way into your hands. This is certainly not your typical university when it comes to social life; by moving to a small Scottish town, you’re in for something a little different. However, as the incoming Events Editor, I’m here to tell you that Fife is a fiesta, and it’s my pleasure to provide you with a guide to going out here in St Andrews.

On your first night in halls, it’s difficult to miss murmurs of the famous Club 601, located within the Union. This hotspot offers a variety of events to the eager fresher including Clan Warfare, Sinners, and the famous Bops. Clan Warfare brings together members of each of the University halls to hurl insults at one another across the club, carrying banners, and wearing hall-branded t-shirts. This inevitably dissolves into a club night, during which any animosity immediately disappears, leading to both friendships and more between rival halls. 

Sinners is the Union’s sports club night. Bringing together masses of different sports clubs, whose members are largely heavily intoxicated from pres, taking shots off skis or parading around in minion costumes…what could possibly go wrong? Without fail, this is the Union’s most unhinged night each week. Rugby boys clad in full formal blue suits guaranteed. 

Bops are a weekly staple of the Union calendar, each week centred on a different theme. The past academic year has seen everything from Taylor Swift to a recreation of the infamous Glasgow Willy Wonka experience. You’d be surprised how invested everyone becomes in the theme and the effort put into outfits.

Despite the fun these events can offer, 601 is not exactly the Croatian superclub you partied in on your gap yah. To the St Andrews student, it’s like a slightly lame old family dog. Is it largely dysfunctional? Yes. But do you adore it anyway? Of course. And by God, do St Andrews students love a night at the Union. This September, the excitement is even greater than usual: 601 closed midway through Candlemas 2023 due to structural integrity issues, so for returning students, it’s our first opportunity to grace its sticky, beer-ridden floors once again. Centrally located, it’s only a quick hop from any sports social or pub trip, and always offers low entry fees. For a pretty fun night out with nothing better to do, you can’t fault it.

Wondering whether to buy the famed all-access freshers pass? That depends how much of a Union devotee you see yourself becoming. In my personal experience, the reverence towards those who’d forked out among hall friends quickly died out as we graduated onto the Vic, St Andrews’ other ‘club’ offering. You will undoubtedly visit the Union multiple times a week, especially in your first semester, but it’s not financially sensical to invest and feel obligated to go to every event. 

The Vic is the Union’s cool, slightly edgy older brother. Hosting proper DJ events from collectives such as BPM and Haus, it’s a lot closer to the typical clubbing experience than 601. Expect extremely random friendships to develop in its roof terrace smoking area, and regrettable amounts of money to be spent on entry fees and drinks. The Vic also requires a little more forward-planning: make sure to have secured a FIXR ticket in advance, or a long and rather cold queue for resale will await you on the night.

In your first few weeks, you’ll be approached by countless third-year couples (and throuples, and… quadruples?) desperate for academic children. Going-out venues are the perfect hunting ground, but don’t let yourself be bowled over by the first pair that approaches promising an unforgettable Raisin. It’s okay to try out a few academic families before settling on one for the event itself. The most suitable parents can often be found in societies rather than randomly at 601.

Drinks wise, St Andrews certainly has its staples. Pablos are the Union’s speciality, consisting of two vodka shots and a VK. These come in many flavours (black cherry being, in my professional opinion, the best). Aikman's sells the dangerously strong La Chouffe beer, only advisable if you’ve got a strong stomach and a hardcore night ahead. Weird golf guys will try to buy you drinks — don’t succumb, unless you’re willing to get into a long and rizz-filled discussion. Speaking of, golfers, largely American, are, unfortunately, ubiquitous, on pub crawls, sampling authentic Scottish whisky (a ‘dram’, if you will, how delightful), and causing trouble at the Vic. Interact at your own risk. 

It’s understandable to yearn for a Wetherspoons here, but fear not. The Rule offers a reliably cheap pint, and society memberships offer good discounts at Molly’s, Aikman's, and elsewhere. Hall pres offer both free alcohol and a chance to meet the rabble you’ll live with for the next year. For a special night out, consider the Physician, a sophisticated cocktail bar, or Mitchell’s, both of which are perfect for a birthday or romantic evening. 

In terms of drinking, it’s also absolutely acceptable not to drink at all. St Andrews is the sort of place which doesn’t necessitate it, and many events don’t even centre around clubbing. From bonfires to academic weddings; to swims to garden parties; to dances to performances, it’s certainly a lot more wholesome here than elsewhere. Other events like fashion shows, Polo, and life drawing can include, but don’t require drinking either. When indulging in such simple pleasures, you’ll be thankful for the lack of extortionate Uber costs across cities, chilly walks miles home, or high club entry prices. 

To conclude, St Andrews offers a feast of events for any eager fresher. From bonfires to pub crawls, to club nights at the Vic, it can be as chill or hardcore as you like. Sure, Dundee is always there if you want a ‘city’ night out, but despite its reputation, St Andrews has enough to do that you certainly won’t be bored. Don’t be surprised if multiple nights in a row see you in a serious hangover daze in 9am tutorials. Reader, you’re in for a real treat.

Illustration: Holly Ward