Mo Darts Returns to 601

601 felt more like Ally Pally on Saturday night. With a pair of lobsters, two men dressed in Lederhosen, and many more, everyone embraced the spirit of the darts. Alice Nicholson and her partner, the lobsters in question, deservedly won best dressed.

The Artful Dodgers (Izzy Checkley and Ella Wilson) had been working their socks off all afternoon. The pair trained at the Whey Pat under the guidance of their new friend, Crail resident John. The 65-or-so-year-old taught them how to throw, kept score, and told them he was proud before leaving to get back to his parrot around the Neuk.

Wilson had even pre-choreographed a walk-out routine in hopes of intimidating their opponents. Sadly, it failed to shake the Botswana Meat Commission pair (Agambir Dhaliwal and Chris Nicholson), who killed the Dodgers’ (and Coach John’s) dreams in Round 1.

Dhaliwal declined press after the victory, telling me to come back when he won. It would’ve been a brilliant narrative arc, but the BMC pair were eliminated in Round 2 by teammates from their own Sunday League side. In honour of Dhaliwal’s original condition, no further comments were collected.

A major upset then struck last year’s reigning champions, The Final Bosses. Eddie Maglione and George Rook, dressed in homage to road-man-impersonator TikToker Vuncle, arrived hoping to defend their title, but the stage disagreed, sending them out in Round 1.

Afterwards, Maglione offered a highly reflective breakdown: “We just weren’t there on stage,” he said. “I went one for three — that’s 33% if you run the numbers.”

He stressed that their chemistry wasn’t lost and instead discussed the pressure men feel to perform. At home, he divulged, he hit triple 20s with ease; under the lights, however, it became a whole different scenario. He even compared a perfect treble to academic success: “I mean, hitting a triple twenty is like getting a first in honours.” Tongue-in-cheek, but rooted in real societal pressure.

Elsewhere, no-shows The Dirty Dogs were subbed out and replaced last minute by seasoned throwers Ani Wong and Maddie Bell. Forced to adapt instantly after an Around-the-World format was adopted, they fell at the first hurdle to eventual runners-up The Bull S*******.

One man grateful for the format shift was announcer James Taylor, who prepared by watching darts commentary on YouTube. “It’s less maths with Around-the-World […] which is probably better for me,” he joked.

The Marlboro Inbreds ultimately emerged victorious, swimming through the competition with ease. Their pair included Luke Jones, who had the most wholesome support in the room — his girlfriend’s Nana. She told me that mental health struggles had affected men in her own family, and she emphasised how far things have come: in her generation, men often suffered in silence, and seeing Movember help break down those walls made her genuinely hopeful.

Amidst the chaos, Movember’s message stayed central. Rosie Grist encouraged men to ask each other how they are really doing. As the sponsors’ rep, she also addressed the long-running criticism that student fundraising can feel “performative.” She rejected this entirely.

“To gauge attention is through performance,” she said. “To say performance is reductive of what we are doing is a critique with no basis, because without the performance, we’ve not started the conversation.”

She added, “It’s these events that raise the money to train mental health professionals. Without these events, we have no money to do these genuinely meaningful things.”

If Saturday proved anything, it’s that St Andrews is long overdue for a darts society. Students embraced the sport with exceptional enthusiasm. But more importantly, the ‘performative’ stage created real, meaningful conversations.

So yes — it was a hit. The night of the year, one might argue.

Because any night where half the room can’t aim, a mysterious pensioner teaches darts at the Whey Pat, and a footballer demands post-match interview conditions before crashing out in Round 2 is a night doing something very right.

Photo by Elodie Cowan